5 Steps To Help You Become Unstuck
Step 1: Start with You
The first step is to decide that from today you will start putting yourself first. I know it is tempting to keep powering on, to remain addicted to busyness and live your entire life for others, but I know from experience that these actions will not help you get unstuck. To move forward in the right direction we need to find time for ourselves. If you have any guilt around doing this, ask yourself - how would it benefit me and those around me if I took better care of myself? Would you be a happier and more present partner, spouse, friend, parent, colleague, etc? To get the clarity needed to discover a path forward from where we are, we need to start eating well, moving our bodies and taking time to be still to hear what our intuition is trying to tell us. Start small and work your way up. A 5 minute walk each day is better than no walk at all or 5 minutes sitting in stillness is better than spending that 5 minutes on social media for example. Maybe you need to hit the brakes completely to do this and take a day off or a longer period of time off work, if possible. Perhaps you can ask family or friends to step in or start saying ‘respectfully no’ more to others, so you can say yes to you and your needs at this time.
Step 2: Seek Support
The next step is to recognise that no one can do this alone. We all reach crossroads at different points in our lives. The people who successfully navigate their way through them seem to have got the memo that finding support is key. It took me a long time to realise how important this is as I thought asking for help was a sign of weakness not strength. Support can come in many forms. It can be from a colleague, friend, connection, coach or mentor. Often, we can get the best results when we seek support from a coach or mentor as they tend to be unbiased, non-judgemental and trained to ask the right questions to help you reality test each path to make sure you are choosing the right one for you.
Step 3: Search Within
The third step involves looking inside for the answers. The first thing we often do when we are lost is look externally to people or things to feel better. We may take advice from well meaning family, friends or colleagues only to end up feeling worse. We might sign up for the latest self help course or treatment without testing if it is what we truly need. Or we might ‘numb out’ with netflix, alcohol, shopping, social media or something else equally addictive. All this can lead to us feeling more confused and losing more precious time. Trust me - you have the answers inside you. By being still, seeking unbiased support and asking yourself reflective questions you can draw these answers out.
Step 4: See your Life Vision Clearly
The fourth step is to get crystal clear on the vision you have for your life. When was the last time you asked yourself questions like; when I look back on my life, what do I want to say about the kind of person I was? What did I experience and with whom? What did I create or bring into this world? What did I achieve and what did I contribute to others? Consider all the areas of your life when asking these questions - self, family, friends, relationships, career, wellness, your environment, community, hobbies, projects, learning and personal development etc. Remember to reality test what comes to mind by asking yourself, what will being that person or spending time on those things give me? Is this truly what you want or need for your life?
Step 5: Step Forward
The final step involves using the awareness you have gained from steps 1-4 and beginning to take supportive action. This stage is all about having fun and exploring what’s possible. Perhaps you seek out people who have achieved what you are looking to achieve, to discover how they did it or people who have experienced what you are experiencing to find out how they got through. Perhaps, you have identified you have a skills gap for that dream job, so you research courses that would help close that gap for you. Or perhaps, you read relevant books, listen to podcasts, ted talks or attend events to get more clarity. The most important thing is to take a single step forward and trust that each step will lead to the next.
Remember that it can take time to become unstuck and find the path that is right for us, so be patient and be kind to yourself while on this journey. You may have days where you take multiple steps forward, and other days you may take steps back. Try to remind yourself at these times that all steps taken are progress and are getting you closer to where you want to be.
Most of us will find ourselves at more than one crossroads in our life. The good news is that you now have 5 steps that you can take to help you move past them so that you can look back and be proud of the life you lived.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my guide. I hope you found it valuable. If you have any questions I would love to hear from you. DM me today at suzie@growmysuccess.ie.
Suzie
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